Monday, February 16, 2015

In Honor of Valentine's Day...

I’ve done a post about this once before but in honor of Valentine’s Day having been this last weekend I thought I’d do another. This is just a smattering of the spectacular messages I receive on the regular from the guys on OkCupid.

I have to believe there are also good guys on this site. The ones below are not these guys. And lest we forget, I also get at least 10 views a week from men well over 40. So special.

I considered editing for grammar / punctuation but I thought you should see the messages in their full glory.

“You looking for some valentines day company? Maybe smoke some weed?”
- Quite the romantic, no?

“Hello sexy. But of course you think im just looking for sex like ever other girl on this site. Lol but hey anyway Lol”
- I couldn’t tell you why he called himself a girl.

“Hey Kyley :) how is it going ? I am cool, kind, educated, romantic, good looking , easy going ...”
- Your profile is empty of everything. Including a photo. Sure you are man, sure you are.

“Ey bb u wan sum fuc? (wait, let me go and change my picture and increase my age before you reply)”
- (W…T…F)

“I'm only here for the weekend. Would you sit on my face?”
- I weep for the future of mankind.

“So serious question.....what's your take on jorts?”
- I don’t really know how to process this.

“Hello Mrs Spectatular. You are gorgeous. I love ur pics. How long u been single?”
- That’s not my name. Also, if I were Mrs. Spectacular I wouldn’t be single. I’d be the wife of Mr. Spectacular, duh.

“Hello dear how are you,i must say you look”
- What does that even mean?

“Hi, are you into black guys
Hi, are you into black guys
Hi, are you into black guys”

- 1. He sent this exact message on three different days. 2. This is such a crap question. Don’t bring race into this.

“hey whats up? hows it going? cute pics........nice smile n eyes..........would u wanna get to know each other? how old ru? ru single?”
- I think you should have to prove competence in your dominant language before you’re allowed to make an online dating profile.

1 comment:

  1. Ky, I figured out #2! "Of course you, like the other girls on this site, think I'm just in it for the sex."