Monday, August 15, 2011

Quotes from Canada eh!

Well, my trip to Canada has come and gone. It was a lot of fun and I plan to write about it later. This post, however, is for a little vacation project I did. During my epic sojourn to the land above, it was decided that hilarious quotes should be recorded and then documented for posterity. The people saying these outstanding things will be:

1. Myself (Kyley)
2. Octavia (Friend who went on the trip with me)
3. Lucy (a British girl who stayed in the same room with us at the hostel, just finished university)
4. Louisa (another British girl who stayed in the same room with us at the hostel, 28, a French and German teacher) and
5. The VIA Train woman (works at the Toronto station)

I will be providing some back-story to help the quotes make more sense. Enjoy.

Situation One: The scene, it’s two in the morning, raining, Octavia and I have stopped at a rest area. We come back out to the car and Octavia proceeds to fumble around in her bag for about a minute and a half looking for her keys.
“Dude, I just want you to know, if this were a horror movie, we would so be dead by now.”- Kyley

Situation Two: We have arrived in Canada! Whilst trying to navigate we come to a red light which Octavia turns at.
“Can you turn right on red in Canada?”- Me
“I don’t know, if not I’ll just plead the fifth.”- Octavia
“We’re not in America!”- Me
“Oh yeah…”- Octavia

Situation Three: After much laughter, Octavia has a thought.
“We should really write down all the good quotes from this trip.”- Octavia
(Okay, so that quote is not actually that funny, but it was at the time because I’d already started doing so via facebook.)

Situation Four: On the train getting close to Toronto. I am annoyed because I can’t see ahead to tell if we are close.
“You know, trains are really bad for trying to see forward.” -Me
“Yeah, but the side view is really good for when you’re like, going around a mountain!”- Octavia
*Blank Stare*- Me

Situation Five: Still on the train, getting ever closer to Toronto.
“Oh! Oh!! I see it!!! … No, wait; it was nothing. Never mind. Don’t write that down.” -Octavia

Situation Six: At dinner with Louisa (see person number 4 above). We are talking about the youth today and how we think we were not as vulgar as they are. Louisa tells us that she agrees, and that she has realized she really needs to keep up with current slang. We ask why and she tells us because she had a student saying the word “growler” in her double period (two hour) class one day. She did not know what the word meant. After class, she asked some of the other teachers and was informed that…
“I let him say vagina in my class! Vagina!! For two hours!!!” -Louisa

Situation Seven: Octavia and I leave the hostel one morning. We pass the building pictured.
“Ooo, I love the deer!” -Octavia
“Those are moose.” -Me

Situation Eight: It’s late, Louisa, Octavia, and I are going to bed, Lucy is not back yet. The following conversation ensues.
“Should I shut the door?” -Louisa
“Yeah, I’m sure she’ll just open it when she gets back.” -Me
“Well yeah, I’m sure she’ll open it! I didn’t very well think she’d walk through it!”- Louisa
*laughter*- Louisa & Octavia
“Yeah, I’m going to go to sleep before I say anything else absurd.” -Me

Situation Nine: Octavia, Lucy, Louisa, and I are in Chinatown eating dinner. Louisa all of the sudden gets very excited and says:
“Oh my gosh, guess what I saw today?!”
“What?” -Lucy
“A chipmunk!!” -Louisa
“No! Those are real?? I thought they were just in the movies!” -Lucy
“Me too! But I saw a chipmunk and a groundhog and a raccoon!” -Louisa
“That’s wild!” –Lucy
At this point Octavia and I have both totally lost it. Apparently in England they don’t have the same rodents as in North America. Additionally, they must think that these animals are all just some huge prank and fabrication put on by the Disney Company.

Situation Ten: Still at dinner, still talking about the differences in animals in our respective countries.
“The seagulls are much bigger in England.” –Louisa
“Oh, do they have like this? *makes motion of elongating chin*” –Me
“That’s a pelican!” –All
“Oh, right, wow, I feel stupid.” –Me
“Write it down! If the chipmunk goes in the book than so does this!” –Louisa

Situation Eleven (The last situation): At the train station getting ready to head back to Windsor. Octavia sees people moving to our gate so we join them. We get to the front of the line.
“And why are you pre-boarding today?” –VIA train lady
“Umm… I don’t know.” *winning smile* –Me
*Odd look* “Well… okay, next time just wait in the line though.” –VIA train lady
“Okay!” –Me and Octavia

So, that’s it. Maybe these are not as hilarious if you were not actually there but I hope you found them at least slightly amusing. I will write about my adventures soon, but until then, stay excellent!

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